Fear has been fighting to gain control of my life in recent weeks as I prepare to embark on a new adventure. In exactly two days, I will be flying 3,000 miles across the Atlantic to begin a 6-month journey of growing in God’s love and sharing that love with the world. I will be attending a Discipleship Training School with a global missions organization known as Youth With A Mission, starting in England and then traveling to one or more countries later.
Lately, I have been asked by many people about my excitement for this upcoming trip. I wouldn’t say that I have been lying through my teeth exactly, I’m most definitely excited to see how God moves, but I think I’m more terrified and nervous than anything. I’ll be honest, that’s been rather difficult to admit to people when they’re standing in front of you. I’m going to England, instead of school this year and what could be more exciting than that, right? It is exciting, but it is also quite terrifying.
What if something goes wrong? What if I’m pushed past my limits and my familiar comfort level? What if I get extremely homesick? What if, what if, what if… There are so many unknowns and new experiences ahead of me and that’s scary. And lately, those what ifs have been racing through my mind non-stop. Fear has a grip on me.
But I realized a few days ago how pointless this fearful mentality actually is. My fear is solely based on the thought of something happening, not of something that has actually happened. All the things that I am afraid of are just imaginary scenarios that have been conjured up in my mind. I am fearful of something that has yet to happen. It has struck me just how silly that notion is; to be afraid of something that has yet to become a reality. And even though all of those things that I fear do have a strong likelihood of occurring, I have a God that will help me through those trials.
It’s so hard to forget that key truth when fear takes over. Fear is such a strong presence in our world today, which means it has become easier to succumb to. And when fear takes over, it takes over. All those warm and fuzzy thoughts are replaced by a dread that can paralyze the mind and body. It keeps you from moving forward and wills you to back out of the opportunity in front of. If you don’t fight back, it conquers and rules.
I’ve let fear consume me these past few weeks and I’m tired of being a puppet on a string. I know that God has an amazing plan for my story to encourage others in the coming months, but I can’t fulfill that predestined plan when I’m bound by fear. It holds me back from pursuing God to the best of my ability.
Therefore, I’ve made a decision. If I’m gonna do this, then I want to be all in. I don’t want to give half of my effort to a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity just because of my perceived inability to break free of chains that God could snap like a twig upon my request.
To be a bit cliche, I’ve decided to let go and let God, and that has made all the difference. Freedom, peace, and a greater excitement has filled my heart and drowned out that fear. I am expectant not of negative things, but of miraculous wonders that I know God will perform in my life and the lives of others.
Are you bound by fear? It’s not fun, I know. But there’s a way out of it. You just have to ask and act. The only way the bondage of fear can be broken is if you rely on the One who has broken all chains. Stop fearing something that has yet to occur and rely on your Father to protect and guide you. Trying to face the many, many fearful occurrences in this world today by yourself would be like trying fly, it’s impossible. But impossible is not in God’s vocabulary and with Him you can conquer the mountains ahead.
“For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline.” [ 2 Timothy 1:7 ]
Michaela is seventeen-years-old and passionate about taking Christ’s name to every corner of the world. She is an aspiring writer and avid reader, documenting her life on her blog Reckless Abandon. On any given day, no matter the time or place, you will spot her with coffee and/or a book in hand. She is currently abroad in England serving with Youth With a Mission and is planning to attend Liberty University in Fall 2017 to major in Writing and Literature or Global Studies.